No. Thank YOU.

By David Small

Most of us have experienced people thanking us for our service. Such gestures always make me uncomfortable. Of course, I appreciate such vocal support of our profession of arms, but somehow the traditional response of “You’re welcome” doesn’t cut it in these situations.

I’m a reservist who lives in the Washington D.C. metro area. You can’t swing a dead cat on the metro without hitting somebody in uniform during morning commutes. But my unit of assignment is in New York City (My apologies to those of you serving in East Jesus, Kansassippi).

Manhattan is a rare place. While the city is steeped in military history, there really isn’t much of a military presence there today. The Navy certainly knows the city well with Fleet Week, an event so ingrained in the city’s culture that it was a topic for an episode of Sex and the City. Subway folks even let anybody with a military ID ride free (even though the practice is only authorized during Fleet Week). And, of course, the city is directly tied to our current overseas contingencies, having been the target of the attacks that initiated such conflict.

But the tiny Staten Island Coast Guard Station, a recruiting booth in Times Square, and a small Army Fort in another borough don’t exactly expose the city that never sleeps to folks in uniform. That’s part of why my small public affairs office exists there.

So, when I am pulling duty in NYC and I walk from the subway to my office on my commute, I get absolutely countless gestures of thanks for my service. You’d never see this in D.C. When I venture to Ess-a Bagel around the corner for breakfast or to P.J. Clarke’s for lunch, I’ve often been the recipient of a kind stranger’s generosity. I think because of the unique nature of the city and the genuine, patriotic people who live there—seeing one guy in Air Force blue is such a rare occurrence that I hear these “thank you’s” much more than anywhere else I’ve ever served in uniform.

It took me a while, but after a couple of years in this post, I developed what I think is a brilliant response to an unsolicited “thank you” for my service. First, I stop walking. In the past, I’d keep going and give an awkward head-nod in return. But now I stop. New Yorkers don’t stop. They barely acknowledge a cab running an intersection let alone another person on the street. But here is somebody who has actually gestured to me and I stop.

And then I respond to them, “No. Thank YOU.” The message is implicit. I thank them for their support of the military. Without public support, we wouldn’t have our military. We wouldn’t be able to do the things we do to protect freedom and the American way. Often this results in a conversation and a chance to educate them on who I am and what I do in the Air Force.

Perhaps sharing my own response will ease the awkwardness for you the next time you’re walking through the airport in uniform and somebody thanks you.